Letni!
"Wow," Krulnor mused as he made his way down the passageway, "The residents of Dleifekaw really are backward. I mean, they haven't even worked out that restaurants function much better in large, square rooms than they do in narrow passageways such as this one."
For that was indeed what the residents of this small community had done. Given that the fourth of their four buildings was clearly some sort of Town Center / Granary / Evil Silo, they had set up the local restaurant in the only spare building, which was the aforementioned passageway. Now, unlike regular passageways, this one didn't actually have any rooms coming off it, it simply ran onwards for a couple of kilometres and then stopped with a door at each end. But, it kept the rain off and at least everybody in the restaurant had a window seat.
Krulnor squeezed past a couple of empty tables, turned sideways to inch past the bar, and then sidled alongside the nearest waiter to extract from him precious Intel about the mission.
"Hey!" Krulnor whispered, even though there was nobody else around and he was only 462mm away from the waiter. But everyone knows good Intel is only ever obtained via whisper. "Where's the bow, shield, and armour hidden? These hogs are a tough task without them!"
The waiter looked at Krunlor sardonically. "Another hero, huh?" He said (in a more hearable and thus much less exciting tone). "You know everyone who has attempted this mission has died. Well, except for Mark the Cowardly but no-one was particularly surprised about that."
"Yes, yes I know!" Krulnor whispered heatedly (hard to imagine how one warms a whistle, but if anyone can, it's our Krulnor). "But if you tell me where the gear is stashed, the least I can give it is my best attempt!"
The waiter cast an appraising eye over Krulnor's fine, muscled physique. (He then reeled his eye back in, though it did get stuck to one of those bar towels for a bit and Krulnor had to go peel it off.) "Well you certainly look the part. Allright, then. This may get me killed you know. Or worse, expelled. But here goes. The strongest two of the hedgehogs currently carry with them at all times the bow and the shield. Gigantor the Hedgehog wields the bow, and Hugh Mungus bears the shield. But you'll see them long before you ever get to know their names; they are the two largest, nastiest, and Most Annoying hedgehogs in the whole crew."
"Great!" Krulnor replied, still in a whisper despite the fact that the passageway was soundproofed, double glazed and had wine corks stuck to the ceiling for extra audio insulation. "And what of the armour of Percy the sensible?"
"Well, seeing as none of the Hedgehogs have ever been able to fit into a human suit of armour, it's stashed in a cupboard right here." The waiter replied, pointing down 1.6m of passageway to a conveniently placed cupboard.
9 minutes, several "ouch!"s, and one stubbed toe later, Krulnor emerged from the passageway clad head to toe in gleaming pink armour (Percy was in this regard not at all Sensible) and bearing his sword, ready for... ACTION!
Previous Chapter : : Next Chapter
For that was indeed what the residents of this small community had done. Given that the fourth of their four buildings was clearly some sort of Town Center / Granary / Evil Silo, they had set up the local restaurant in the only spare building, which was the aforementioned passageway. Now, unlike regular passageways, this one didn't actually have any rooms coming off it, it simply ran onwards for a couple of kilometres and then stopped with a door at each end. But, it kept the rain off and at least everybody in the restaurant had a window seat.
Krulnor squeezed past a couple of empty tables, turned sideways to inch past the bar, and then sidled alongside the nearest waiter to extract from him precious Intel about the mission.
"Hey!" Krulnor whispered, even though there was nobody else around and he was only 462mm away from the waiter. But everyone knows good Intel is only ever obtained via whisper. "Where's the bow, shield, and armour hidden? These hogs are a tough task without them!"
The waiter looked at Krunlor sardonically. "Another hero, huh?" He said (in a more hearable and thus much less exciting tone). "You know everyone who has attempted this mission has died. Well, except for Mark the Cowardly but no-one was particularly surprised about that."
"Yes, yes I know!" Krulnor whispered heatedly (hard to imagine how one warms a whistle, but if anyone can, it's our Krulnor). "But if you tell me where the gear is stashed, the least I can give it is my best attempt!"
The waiter cast an appraising eye over Krulnor's fine, muscled physique. (He then reeled his eye back in, though it did get stuck to one of those bar towels for a bit and Krulnor had to go peel it off.) "Well you certainly look the part. Allright, then. This may get me killed you know. Or worse, expelled. But here goes. The strongest two of the hedgehogs currently carry with them at all times the bow and the shield. Gigantor the Hedgehog wields the bow, and Hugh Mungus bears the shield. But you'll see them long before you ever get to know their names; they are the two largest, nastiest, and Most Annoying hedgehogs in the whole crew."
"Great!" Krulnor replied, still in a whisper despite the fact that the passageway was soundproofed, double glazed and had wine corks stuck to the ceiling for extra audio insulation. "And what of the armour of Percy the sensible?"
"Well, seeing as none of the Hedgehogs have ever been able to fit into a human suit of armour, it's stashed in a cupboard right here." The waiter replied, pointing down 1.6m of passageway to a conveniently placed cupboard.
9 minutes, several "ouch!"s, and one stubbed toe later, Krulnor emerged from the passageway clad head to toe in gleaming pink armour (Percy was in this regard not at all Sensible) and bearing his sword, ready for... ACTION!
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posted by Musings | 7:34 PM
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