A Quest Beginneth
If there was ever a greater hero than Krulnor, history does not recall it. Single-handedly Krulnor defeated the leviathan of Scree, raided the toxic barns of the three handed barbarians, and took out the garbage of Desmond the disgusting; yet none of these tasks compared in any way to the task that was about to unfold before him, the task for which his name would go down in history, the task for which epic poems would be composed in his honour, the task for which his mother would gloat to all of her friends about how her son was better than all of their sons and how she always knew he would achieve something in life and how he was such a good boy and he always remembered her birthday and last year he got her such a lovely card and sent her flowers.
The quest began inconspicuously, whilst Krulnor was busy doing his mighty washing, having separated his mighty whites from his mighty colours and added mighty detergent before hitting them with a mighty rock on the mighty river bank. Suddenly and without warning, like a Romanian rugby victory, a scrawny and out of breath messenger ran up to our hero.
“Krulnor! Krulnor! We need your help!”
Krulnor sighed. It was always the same; no matter what time of year he decided to do his washing there was always someone wanting him to go off on some quest or save some damsel or kill some dragon. Half the time he didn’t even get to finish the first load, which could be a real problem –trying to fight a five headed ogre whilst your loincloth was still covered in washing suds was not a comfortable proposition.
“OK, what’s the problem?”
The scrawny messenger, suddenly realizing that he was in the presence of his hero, lowered his eyes to the ground and muttered something under his breath about an evil something and a quest something something and killing something-or-other.
Krulnor sighed again and rinsed the river water from his soapy garments. He supposed that the troll bloodstain could wait another year to be removed. Right now a quest beckoned. Picking up his sword, shield, battleaxe, bow and arrow, battle helmet, food sack, staff, and laundry bag, Krulnor again found himself wishing he had an assistant to help carry his stuff, but like the heroic hero that he was he said nothing, but instead silently and heroically followed the messenger back in the direction he had come from...
... and into his destiny.
Contents Page *** Next Epic Chapter
The quest began inconspicuously, whilst Krulnor was busy doing his mighty washing, having separated his mighty whites from his mighty colours and added mighty detergent before hitting them with a mighty rock on the mighty river bank. Suddenly and without warning, like a Romanian rugby victory, a scrawny and out of breath messenger ran up to our hero.
“Krulnor! Krulnor! We need your help!”
Krulnor sighed. It was always the same; no matter what time of year he decided to do his washing there was always someone wanting him to go off on some quest or save some damsel or kill some dragon. Half the time he didn’t even get to finish the first load, which could be a real problem –trying to fight a five headed ogre whilst your loincloth was still covered in washing suds was not a comfortable proposition.
“OK, what’s the problem?”
The scrawny messenger, suddenly realizing that he was in the presence of his hero, lowered his eyes to the ground and muttered something under his breath about an evil something and a quest something something and killing something-or-other.
Krulnor sighed again and rinsed the river water from his soapy garments. He supposed that the troll bloodstain could wait another year to be removed. Right now a quest beckoned. Picking up his sword, shield, battleaxe, bow and arrow, battle helmet, food sack, staff, and laundry bag, Krulnor again found himself wishing he had an assistant to help carry his stuff, but like the heroic hero that he was he said nothing, but instead silently and heroically followed the messenger back in the direction he had come from...
... and into his destiny.
Contents Page *** Next Epic Chapter
posted by Lark Victory | 5:44 PM
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